
Not every day can be a great day.
Over the years I have learned to be more truthful with my feelings and stop hiding behind the "I'm fine" response which most often translates I am not okay. Saying I wasn't okay seemed to admit defeat or reveal a lack of faith. I convinced myself somewhere along the path of perceived togetherness, it wasn't okay to not be okay.
My mind would say if I prayed harder, there'd be more Happy. If I listened to worship music and read my Bible a little longer, my circumstances might change which would surely change my heart and mind too. I would never had admitted a bad day for fear of being judged that I was a hypocrite or a weak Christian. How sneaky and manipulative is our enemy.
It took getting stuck in lots of pits and circling the same walls over and over to finally get through them. I've learned to honestly answer, "Not every day can be a great day, and I am not okay, but God is faithful." It is bearing false witness if you say everything's great when it's not. The false joy and perceived peace are not healing hopes. They are deceiving masks.
When we seek the will of God and trust Him with our hearts, it is here we find the joy, peace and endurance for the race set before us. We cannot always be happy, Jesus certainly wasn't. He too took time to get alone and pray.
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"You turned my wailing into dancing; You removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to You and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give You thanks forever."
Psalm 30:11-12
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Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
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Read more...God had stirred our hearts for a few years about making a move. We began anxiously and casually looking around our community for a new house. Beginning with a neighboring community with acreage and the possibility for enough land for horses. Off and on for a year, we looked with open hearts and minds.
Summer 2014 came and we were facing the oldest's last year of high school. We only had a few months to make a move and take on a little "adventure" as a family of 6. And yes, we thought moving 20-30 minutes away was an adventure. But nothing felt right. Doors only closed and we never had peace about any of the houses or areas we looked at.
We prayed that if that if God wanted us to dare to trust bigger, we were willing. Sure enough, we both knew He was calling us to uproot bigger, we just didn't know where He would lead, but we were ready and willing for one year!