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Dorm Life : Staying Connected with Your Child

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Staying Connected: Tips for Maintaining a Strong Parent-Child Relationship

Sending your child off to college is a major life transition for both parents and students. While it’s an exciting time filled with new opportunities and experiences, it can also bring feelings of separation and anxiety. Maintaining a strong parent-child relationship during this period is crucial for emotional support and mutual understanding. 

Here are some practical tips to help you stay connected literally and emotionally with your college student....

Establish Clear Communication

1. Set Expectations Early: Before your child leaves for college, have an open discussion about how often and through which means you will communicate. Some students might prefer daily check-ins, while others may be comfortable with weekly updates. No child is the same so don't compare to one of the siblings, what the routine ws in high school, or what other parents are doing. This is between YOU & YOUR TEEN.

2. Use Multiple Platforms: Be open to the use of various communication tools such as texting, calling, video chats, and social media. Each platform offers different advantages, from quick updates to more in-depth conversations. Tech is always changing and our teens are on the cutting edge of it all....you may be learning new things every semester! 

3. Respect Their Schedule: Be mindful of your child's class schedule, study times, and social activities. Give them space and grace to get back to you. Avoid calling or texting during known busy periods to prevent disruptions. Be sure to also let them know yours so they know when it's best to catch up!

Create a Routine

4. Schedule Regular Check-ins: Establish a routine for regular check-ins, whether it’s a weekly phone call, a Sunday night video chat, or a daily text message. In the beginning, consistency helps in maintaining a steady connection if they are needing that with you. Don't be alarmed if they say once a week or less...but be honest if you are needing assurance in the beginning months to just hear from them and know they are okay.

5. Share Family Updates: Keep your child informed about family news and events. This helps them feel included and connected to home even when they are far away. We created a Family Chat and Shared Album through our iPhones to stay connected with all 4 kids. Now we have a family snap chat....not my favorite but it's where they are, so I am too!

Offer Support and Encouragement

6. Be a Good Listener: When your child shares their experiences, listen fully without immediately offering solutions or judgments. Sometimes they just need to vent or talk things through. They will stop communicating if they feel a lecture or a big conversation is going to happen every time.

7. Provide Emotional Support: College is stressful. Offer words of encouragement, and remind your child that it's okay to ask for help, whether from you, friends, or campus resources. Occasionally text Scriptures throughout the week without asking any questions. Offer to pray with them on the phone.

8. Celebrate Achievements: Acknowledge and celebrate their successes, no matter how small. Whether it’s a good grade, joining a club, or making new friends, positive reinforcement goes a long way.

Encourage Independence

9. Encourage Problem-Solving: Support your child in developing their problem-solving skills by encouraging them to find solutions independently. Do your best to facilitate the questions that lead them to the right place. This fosters confidence and self-reliance. Plus, as it goes with college, they have access to Advisors and Teachers who are there to support the students when it comes to classroom, schedule and campus questions. 

10. Respect Their Independence: Give your child the space to grow and make their own decisions. Trust that they are capable of managing their new responsibilities. You may not always understand them or agree, but showing your support with your valued opinions and praying with them, and for them, is valuable.

Stay Involved

11. Visit When Possible: If able, help them with hometown visits as you also plan occasional visits to their college. Attend family weekends, sports events, or other activities where parents are welcome. Just make sure these visits are welcome and don’t intrude on their new life.

12. Send Care Packages: Everyone loves a surprise! Sending a care package with their favorite snacks, a handwritten note, or small essentials can brighten their day and show that you’re thinking of them. As long as you have their address, most dorms allow deliveries from Vendors and Amazon.

Make Time for Personal Interaction

13. Plan Family Events: Coordinate family events during breaks or long weekends. Whether it’s a short trip, a holiday gathering, or just a weekend at home, these moments are invaluable for reconnecting, even if it's a Zoom Party.

14. Engage in Shared Interests: Find common interests that you can share from a distance. Watch the same TV shows, read the same books, or follow the same sports teams. These shared experiences can be great conversation starters, ice breakers and connection places as you both establish new routines and hobbies.

Embrace Technology

15. Use Apps to Stay Connected: There are many apps designed to help families stay in touch. From group chats to shared calendars, find what works best for you and your child.

16. Virtual Activities: Engage in virtual activities together, such as online games, virtual movie nights, or even video call dinners. These activities can create a sense of togetherness despite the physical distance.

Be Patient and Understanding

17. Accept Changes: College is a transformative time. Your child will grow and change, and so will your relationship. Be open to this evolution and adapt your communication style as needed, helping them stay focused on Matthew 6:33, seeking God first always!

18. Give Them Time: There will be periods when your child might be too busy or stressed to communicate frequently. Be patient and understanding during these times, knowing that your support is always there when they need it.

Just as with any relationship, respect and boundaries go a long way! Maintaining a strong parent-child relationship during the college years takes effort, but it’s crucial to remain calm through it all. By staying connected, offering support, and respecting their independence, you can ensure that your bond remains strong and continues to grow even as they (and you!) embark on this new chapter in life.

*If you are reading this and your kiddo is still in high school, implementing some of these healthy habits and processes is beneficial for both you and them. 18 years of living in the same space, hearing each other's voice every day and helping one another creates a void when they move out, which is why this is such a bittersweet time for everyone in the family. Younger siblings will grieve in their own way too, so be mindful of them throughout this life transition. 

I pray this is full of helpful resources for you. 
Blessings Mama, 
Michele 

If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
 in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!

Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
I am so glad (and honored) you are here! I have been blogging since 2009 as a way to journal out my thoughts as I pray God would use these story shares as practical heart encouragements for YOU TOO! We all need to recall and share those Living Stone moments.
Feel free to look around and make yourself at home! 

If you're looking for Journals & Books, check these out over on HeartsFromGod.com too!!

If you are looking for an Online Sister Community 
?Are you an Introvert Rising?!? If you are looking for a Community of HEART Centered, Jesus Lovin' Sisters ready to rise up over their insecurities and seek after the Heart of God?!?  Meet us here! 

I share encouragement over on the Facebooks on my personal profile as well as the Encouragement Page Livin’ Where Faith Is on too.

I have two free resources for you: 
1.) If you'd like some help sharing YOUR story or testimony, here's a link to grab the fill in the blank PDF I created to help you get started sharing YOUR heart with others! There's a video that goes with it over in the But God Sister Squad Community on Facebook.

2.) www.CreatingSpaceforGrace.com is PDF I share the things I have done (and do) the help guard my peace on the daily!!! I get asked about this all the time, this is my practical resource guide!

Heart Hugs and Blessings,

Michele"For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named that according to the riches of His glory He may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith--that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen."
Ephesians 3:14-21 ESV


Pssst...by Law, I have to share there are affiliate links in here where I earn money from your purchase when you make a purchase! it's affiliate marketing and I love not having to sell stuff! And you know me, I am not gonna sell anything, but I will share everything! I love it! 

A Little About My Heart

 
Born and raised in the church, a Christ Follower, Kingdom Encourager, Wife, Mama, and an Overcomer! GLORY TO GOD!!

I lived most of my life fearful, anxious, and insecure.. I found myself always hiding but serving, striving for perfection in my less-thanness, as a way to earn my worth to self, God and others, sacrificing in the name of serving, hospitality and humility...putting others needs before my own from a place of hiding in my lack, and trying to earn value rather than serving in the space of grace, confident faith and overflowing love. 

Never attaining, only to lead a life of more insecurity, overwhelm, anxiety, and panic, screaming to break free from this bondage, to be that actual strong, courageous Christian Woman everyone else seemed to be, but me. 

BUT GOD.

In 2009, Where Faith Is was born as a blog, learning my voice behind the safety of a keyboard, building courage to speak my truth behind the screen...and here all these years later, Little by little, God is expanding my heart boundaries as He reveals more of His to me. I am so excited to share so freely! 

I especially love being an encourager to other encouragers in the faith who know they are called to encourage yet they themselves struggle with their value and ability. Isn't that how the enemy works? He tries to disqualify us in the same area we are called to shine! What an irony!  

I believe if more people let go of fear and insecurity, surrendered to grace and BELIEVED their value, their spark for life will return to a roaring fire that lights up wet wood! 

When women choose to walk courageous and strong in body, mind and spirit...they step out of the boat and walk on water as Peter did, part the waters like Moses and set more people FREE in His name through their Divine purpose to the Glory of GOD! We are each a Light House of Strength on the shorelines of Grace . 

Friend, you may not believe it, but you are meant for more than eat/sleep/work/repeat. You are also equipped with good works to serve and bless the Kingdom Body, and the world with His Love, through YOU! You've got to surrender your fear and let Him lead you.

You are more able than you think you are and most likely, the thing you feel is the weakest part of you is the strongest thing about you!

If you are an introvert too and want to be a part of our newly launching online community, we are here for you!! Let's Connect! It's an honor to encourage the Encouragers.

I am H.I.S. (Heart In Surrender & Service).

Hugs & Blessings, 
Michele

"So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:1-4

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