Imagine if there was an emoji that appeared externally that honestly expressed how you were currently feeling?! What a sight that would be and how telling when someone says they are fine and yet their emoji shows anger or pain or tears. I am kinda glad we can simply smile and wave for the sake of privacy and no attention and yet, in my heart, I wish someone would pray for me, and offer encouragement to my hurting heart, or body!
For me, this has been a long journey of healing the inside of me and it made me start thinking about it due to a recent physical hurting I experienced when I hurt my neck from a slip on a wet floor. Most days are good days but there's days like today I wish I could sleep it off for a few hours and wake up refreshed and spunky, back at the tasks needing to be accomplished today.
In the beginning there were more awful days than good days. I couldn't carry any weight, including my 100 lb Study Bible or my simple purse. For a while, I could not work in the yard, do our laundry, and my favorite thing living here in Florida: paddle boarding and snorkeling. Even a simple ride on the boat had me on shambles for a while. My favorite safe spot was the pool....zero gravity! Hallelujiah!
Over time with therapy and oils, strength has slowly come back but every now and then, it locks up and swells sending me to rearrange my day to include ice packs and heating pad rotations, along with couch and floor rotations! But life goes on despite the pain. Moms are such resilient creatures, lol!! Sitting helpless is not my forte'. I love serving my family and others. I love being on the water and in my yard. My heart aches for those who have to deal with similar, and worse, chronic ailments day in and day out, for years. It gets exhausting and frustrating. Being out of commission impacts those around you in ways you can't imagine. It can be exhausting and frustrating for them as well.
As I rest here with my thinkings on the heating pad, I can't help but think of the other pains we carry sometimes for a season, or maybe even chronically as thorns in our flesh. Physical ailments aren't the only thing that can unravel and arrest our day. Emotional pains unravel us too. They hurt our bodies dare I say as equally as physical ones. Conflicts at home with a spouse or child, or in the work place, betrayals of family or friends, loss of loved ones, illnesses, and miscommunications, world and community divisions, a lost dream or a wayward child, hurt our hearts, depressing our heart and body, figuratively and literally. When I am in physical pain, it depresses my mood and leaves me frustrated and in likeness, emotional pain hurts my body on the inside where it may not be obvious to the seeing eye.
I laugh at the emoji idea...can you imagine?!? What if there was a frowning emoji that appeared on our foreheads when we were hurting deeply on the inside, physically or emotionally, how many of us would actually have one? And would we want people to even know? Hmmm. I know some people enjoy a good pity party, so maybe some will. I am not one who is an attention seeker and is better at isolating to "deal," I would rather others not know unless I see need to share as maybe it keeps me from fulfilling a task promised. I hate attention. If I am hurting in any way, I would rather stay home alone. For years, the enemy tempted me with putting on the Faithful, Courageous, Never Anxious Christian Mask so no one would know that in that season I was afraid, hurt, fearful. If they knew, would they think I was a poor Christian? A bad Mom? A bad wife? A disappointing daughter?
Over the years, the Lord has helped me learn to take off the mask and share my heart better with the trusted few He has blessed me with to pray my way through the painful moments in life. What a blessing they are to me. We all need praying friends for such a time as this. In the good times when life is full of laughter and on days the anguish consumes our days. We were meant for heart dwelling and connections to the trusted vessels God gifted to us. And oddly enough, much of my healing journey is the foundation of my encouragement ministry.
Following Christ does not exempt followers from suffering and persecution. The Scriptures tell us these momentary sufferings produce a weight of eternal glory. Will we trust Him? Will we deny Him? Will our spirits glean hope from the cloud of witnesses who have gone before us in this life and endure this race? Will we forgive ourselves? Others? Will pain or praise be our battle cry? As Believers, strength comes from The Word and we are wise to dwell in it with ferver and consistency, putting on its armor and walking in its wisdom.
While we are left on this earth, as woman, can we also give thanks to the Lord for good hair products, cute clothes and awesome make up?!? For real. Thank You Lord! Unfortunately the eyes are windows to the soul and only a good pair of sunglasses can hide those. My closest friends can look me in the eyes and within 15 seconds know there is pain somewhere inside me. So if you see me wearing my sunglasses and it's not especially sunny, there's your first clue. I took this picture today to remind me of these thorny days that pain may threaten my praise but praise will always threaten my pain. God is greater.
"pain may threaten my praise
but praise will always threaten my pain"
Whatever pain you have inside you today, take comfort knowing God is compassionate and sees you where you are. There may remain a thorn or two in your flesh as do many of us, but God...His grace will be amazing if we give into resting in it and not fighting against it. The pain may not fully go away, and that’s a hard one to figure out but who are we to question the sovereign God who has established not only our path, but the course of all time and everything in it.
Trust His timing and do not fear the trials you are facing within. Cry out to the Lord and surrender the questions and the pain to His care. He is more than able to carry you though the valley under the shadow of His wings, beside His still waters. No one else may know your pain, but God...He does. There is strength and comfort in numbers where 2 or more are gathered, so I encourage you and challenge you to ask Him to show you who you can trust, then let them into your heart, for such a time as this. All the glory is His.
“Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.
Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” Romans 12:9-18 ESV
Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” Romans 12:9-18 ESV
Be still my soul, be still.
Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless His Holy Name.
He is good. Amen.
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in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!
Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
