How To Emotionally Prepare Your Heart When Your Kids Leaves for College

Was it enough....a question every Mom asks herself when her now grown child leaves the house for college...Was it enough?!? Did I say all the right things? Do they know how to do all the things? Are they strong enough to manage the world at large on their own, did I prepare them enough? Did I love them enough? Do they believe in themself? Do they know how much they are loved by me, God, others? Was all I said lined up with all I did? Was I enough?

I'll never forget when child #1 left for college. I panicked! I hadn't even taught him how to sew a button or iron a shirt! What was I thinking!?! So, out came the sewing kit and iron, along with all the other random things you just don't really thing about amongst Mom Life. Simple and silly things too many to number. For each following child, the intentionality grew in passing along life skills and fun hacks! 

I sat there on the driveway pondering my Mom List of Factoids I should have shared, the Lord showed up next to me and said, "Grace Mama, I am Enough. I Got Them." He does. My heart skipped a beat in relief and rest, easing the pain of regret and insecurity that had swelled inside me.

I may not have taught them how to make homemade bread or start a garden, I did show them the magic tricks of folding a fitted sheet and ironing around the shoulders of a dress shirt. They also know how to use their oils to heal ailments and they know how to use a glue gun and a drill! 3 out of 4 are a good shot too, just sayin'.

But more importantly, they learned Love and Grace. There is no perfect Mom and I was reminded of that on the daily as hard as I strived to be. They learned Jesus in our home. They learned serving others. They learned the importance of trust, honor and respect. They learned forgiveness, compassion and empathy. They dreamed, stretched and learned to navigate relationships as a family of 6. 

Mom Life is a Ministry Calling. The most important gift we can give our children is spiritual legacy, to train them up in the Name of Jesus, making Him known and allowing God to be God in their life. Our Home is a mission field and it's hard work, but good work. There will be trials and rejection, push back and heartache in a house full of sinners! 

But God!  

Sending out a Heart Hug for your next driveway moment as you sit with such a tender, wondering heart. Deep breaths knowing He is near and He's Got You! He is enough because He is Everything we could ever need as a Mom, and He is the same loving Father to your children too!!

Hugs & Massive Love!

If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
 in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!

Heart Hugs and Blessings,

How To Be a Good Mom (When You Know You're Not Perfect)

As a Mom, do you ever feel like in one question you can go from Hero to Zero?

They asked for ice cream for dessert (a rarity in a house where Mom and Dad are trying to make healthy choices!!)
I said Yes. They replied I was the Best!!

They asked to stay up 30 min past bedtime to finish a favorite show.
I said Yes. They replied I was the Best!!

And then the No KNOW they didn't think or feel I was "The Best" when I said NO. I quickly went from Hero to Zero.

Each time they shout "Mom, You're the BEST!!!!!" I remind them that I am a good Mom regardless if they got what they wanted or not. I ALWAYS have their best in mind. I ALWAYS do my best to give them the desires of their hearts. I ALWAYS do what I can when I can for them. But, I don't always tell them Yes. 

In their eyes, I am not always their Hero.

NO, you may not play with the fire.
NO, you may not download that song with those lyrics even if the rhythm is cool.
NO, you may not have ice cream for breakfast.
NO, you may not drive my car at the age of 14.
NO, you may not watch certain shows.
NO, you may not date yet.
NO, you will NOT wear pants that show your undergarments. 
NO, you may not have a sleepover on a school night.
NO, you may not have a $135 pair of tennis shoes.
NO, you may not skip school.
NO, you may not roll your eyes at me
NO, you may not be rude to your sibling because they made you mad.
NO, you may not eat cookies for breakfast.
NO, you may not sit on the couch and watch TV all day long. 
NO, you may not skip church cuz you're tired. 

Yes, I will protect you.
Yes, I will be there for you when no one else is.
Yes, I will love you always.
Yes, I will hug you and sit with you any chance I am able.
Yes, I will watch your favorite movie with you.
Yes, I will make sure you have what you need for school.
Yes, I will do all I can to provide a healthy environment- physically, emotionally and spiritually. 
Yes, I will teach you how to behave, treat others, study the bible, tithe, drive, clean, every life skill I can.
Yes, I will forgive you when you crush my heart, roll your eyes.
Yes, I will reward you for your obedience and discipline you in your disobedience.
Yes, I will celebrate your victories in life and encourage you through the trials.
Yes, I will ESPECIALLY teach you all that I know about the Lord our God!!!!
Yes, I will always pray for you and hold you close.
Yes, I will hold you accountable!!!

My Child, I know the Nos don't feel good and you don't like them, but I Love You. I am still good, regardless of how you feel. Your opinion in the moment doesn't change the fact that I am good. No, I am not perfect,  I am a sinner saved by grace,  just like you, on a path of righteousness, just like you, intentionally living my life with Christ as my core,  just like you, I must confess my sins, just like you, I tithe my money, just like you. I don't understand God's way all the time, just like you. I have questioned if God was good when I didn't like His answer too.

But God, He is always good. He always has our best in mind. It doesn't always feel good, I know, but when you love someone, you trust them. God's Love is so Perfect, full of Grace and Mercy, unconditional and life-giving.

He is consistent, faithful and good. Whether I agree with what God is doing in my life...even if it is a discipline I know I absolutely deserve, He is still good. God is ALWAYS good. My opinion doesn't matter. It doesn't change the FACT that GOD IS GOOD!!!! 

Mama, you aren't perfect and no one said you were supposed to be. Steady your heart on Your Father's Love for you and in that overflow, love your children in the same measure of grace and patience. You are a good Mom!

To GOD be ALL the Glory!!!

If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
 in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!

Heart Hugs and Blessings,

My Tips for Mamas Feeling Overwhelmed and Numb : How To Feel Purposeful Again

No real passion, no hope for change, no real connection. 

My soul was numb. My soul was downcast, oh my soul.

Did it mean I had lost love for my God, others, coffee or chocolate? No. I just felt numb, and sometimes, invisible, as a woman amongst so many other amazing women. 

Permission to NOT Be a Perfect Mom

God did not create us for a robotic life of busyness and living life on auto-pilot, constantly hustling to achieve the next expectation in the name of proving worthiness, or the evidence of what a Christian Woman should live and look like.

The evidence is Jesus, and we are His vessels of Love here on this Earth, that all people in all nations will know the Grace of God…not the judgements of God.