Let's Talk about stepping outside of our comfort zone as a shy Christian Introvert while navigating social Interactions. I've talked about Overcoming Social Anxiety over here in this blog so feel free to hop over there afterwards if that's something you've struggled with too...
Today, lets talk about talking to anyone, anytime and how to overcome this freak out moment we feel the moments we walk into a new space and feel overwhelmed, whether it's running into a neighbor, sitting next to a stranger and trying to not make eye contact, or attending events knowing you will be meeting people since it's....an....event! LOL (The blog mentioned above will deep dive into that for ya!)
I think most Introvert women don't find it extremely hard to talk to people, because we already choose to talk to a few people at a time anyway, AND those few people are usually, OUR people. It's when we get outside of our comfortzones and have to manage the anxiety that comes with unprepared conversations!!
This used to trigger me so much I would never go to social events alone, always hiding behind my extrovert friend....and forever, not making eye contact in order to avoid being called on in a group setting, or engaging in the small talk of meeting someone. Cuz you think it makes you invisible...haha, not so! They will just yell your name louder or walk straight up to your face and start talking! It's best to look up, just saying!
I don't know what's scarier, a big group setting or a small group. In big group, you can more easily camouflage in whereas the smaller groups, they can look you in the eye and start talking to you! EEK!!! It's not that we don't LOVE the people, its the trigger of sheer panic in the unknown of what's about to happen!
What will they ask me...What will I say when they ask whatever...Will I look stupid....Will I fumble my words...Will I forget my words...Will I have a piece of salad in my teeth from the dinner... Will they ignore me, make fun of me, see my insecurities....Will they reject me and exclude me from that point on from anything qualifying me as their friend or partner, or whatever the circumstance.
Just the thought of going to a new place alone would raise the panic into the Numb-Zone or Robot-Zone. If you've had panic and anxiety, you likely know the feeling of auto-pilot, avoidance, out of body experiencing of the moment, grasping for breath and control....controlling of your thoughts zinging all around in your head, your heart rate running on a treadmill and not stepping off any time soon, all the while smiling and listening to the actual conversation happening, not the one you are thinking COULD happen, or may be happening between the words layered on the ACTUAL one....oh boy what a spastic space!
Instead of completely avoiding, numbing, or anxiety amnesia and have no clue what happened, I would love to help you find some PEACE & JOY and STOP panicking when you talk to someone. It's gonna take being intentional with your energy and focus...and practice for your heart and brain to learn where it is safe. So, lets talk about the 3 things you can do to talk to others rooted in LOVE and not FEAR! By combining practical tips with the wisdom of scriptures, any shy girl can find courage! I SURE HAVE and let me tell you....it will change every part of your life, most importantly your relationships and even more precious, your relationship with Your Heavenly Father! Ohhh, it's gooooood. I am so excited for you!!
Tip 1: Prayerful Preparation
One of key things for overcoming anxiety is preparation. Before entering any social setting, PRAY and step into Grace the won't let you go! Take a minute and consider that GOD has not only pinned this day for you, but He is also with you. He also has not only equipped you for this encounter, but He is WITH you in it too!!! When we remember the Foundation we stand on, the presence He promises, when we turn our eyes on His purposes (I talked about this in the above blog), we can step into the unknown knowing we re not alone nd there is nothing we cannot handle with Him beside us.
Don't mistake nerves for fear. It's okay to be a little nervous, it IS the unknown. It helps me lean more onto God for His help with words, energy, focus, purpose, comfort, wisdom, discernment. As I prepare, I am entering into worship of praise. Praise and Worship move the focus off of me and fretting about all I am not, and instead, focus on all GOD IS!
So, deep breath and lean into Philippians 4:6-8, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.Think on these things..." the are GOOD!
Tip 2: Listening with Love
Instead of dwelling on the fear of saying the wrong thing, or wondering what they are thinking, shift your focus to genuine listening. Proverbs 2:2-5 encourages us to "turn your ear to wisdom and apply your heart to understanding." By actively listening, you not only connect with others on a deeper level but also alleviate the pressure of constant talking.
Most people enjoy talking about themselves and I found this to be a great way to deflect from myself having to talk, and risk being judged. Sadly, while this helped me be a great listener, I became a good stuffer, hiding my own thoughts and feelings to feel safe and unseen. Learning to listen with a filter of Love means genuine exchange, giving and receiving between each one, including YOU!
Tip 3: Anticipation not Anxious
Scripture emphasizes the importance of fixing our eyes on Jesus during challenging times. Hebrews 12:2 encourages us to "fix our eyes on Jesus, the perfecter of faith." When we recognize that our racing heart and lump in our throat can come from sheer panic as well as extreme joy, as I sit in worship, sit in Love, I can reframe my brain to seek anticipation of something amazing about to connect between us. I consider what if I am being sent by God to be His hands and feet, His heart hug to this person. What a humbling thought to consider, being a vessel of hope and love to someone else in Jesus Name.
As Christ followers, this is our purpose! We bridge gaps of Heaven and Earth with Love. If we surrender our hearts nd minds to God, He can more feely move through us. It is a wondrous freedom!! Fear submits to faith and faith leads us into Love where we find joy and peace, courage and confidence. Its exciting to believe you are sent.
Does that mean awareness doesn't happen? Does that mean every conversation will be flowing and memorable, profound and life altering for you or them? No. Let go of the pressure of any outcome!
This should be BONUS TIP #4! JUST SHOW UP, willing, available, courageous and prepared to see something new because you know, He's renewing our minds and always doing a new thing! His mercies are new every single morning. He can do immeasurably more than we can ever think or imagine!
Be patient and practice!!! Focus on Love, not loss...fear what blessing you'll miss rather than what you'll mess up! His heart is for you and is near! Grace upon Grace!!! Jesus is your Guide, Way, Words, Strength, Support, Courage, Peace and very breath. Give Him your breath.
He's got you!!! Keep your eyes open for the women and Mentors He will place in your path to sharpen your iron. They will lift you through their example and affirmations, prayers. Learn from them. Humble yourself, admit where you are feeling weak and let them step into courage with you!! It's a powerful and beautiful learning and rising up to the Glory and Grace of God!!
He's Got You...They've Got You...and I've got you too! I will be hosting workshops and challenges in my Sister Group (ButGodSisterSquad.com) to help you practice these things but in your every day life, pray and practice! There are no do overs in life. LIVE IT!!!!!! A 7 Day Love Others Challenge is happening in there already!
So much anticipation & love for you!
Your Fellow Shy Introvert,
Michele
Hey - If you haven't seen my list of tons of ways you share love with others, grab it here! LoveForAll.MicheleDickerson.com
If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!
Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
It's the season of love! Sadly, many people don't feel loved. December and February are documented as months with the highest rates of depression, anxiety and life ending thoughts and actions. Perhaps the New Year Goals we so desperately hoped for, didn't happen. Maybe we've experienced loss or betrayal in our life. Maybe our body is just worn out and depleted leaving us feeling weak.
As Christ Followers, we are charged with sharing HIS LOVE with all, just as He did! In a season many struggle with feelings of self-worth, loneliness, and anxiety how much more important is it for us to surround ourselves with MORE LOVE so the from the Love we hold, we can share because I learned the hard way, giving from the fumes, won't go far....Here's what I do to keep my eyes fixed on God's Heart so I can stay hydrated with His Living Water and share with others.....
1. Surround Yourself with Worship:
Infuse your surroundings with worship. Play uplifting worship music in the background of your home, in the car, on the go! Philippians 4:8, think about the loveliness of God and count your blessings in every day. Focus on the goodness of God, not the circumstances around you. God knows. He is near.
2. Build a Circle of Like-Minded Sisters in Faith:
In times of struggle, a strong support system can make all the difference. Connect with like-minded sisters in faith who can offer empathy, encouragement, and prayer. Joining a faith community, (here's mine) whether in person or online, and if you don't have a church home yet, it's so important you do! Most important though is have people in your life you can ask to pray for you, whether in need or in covering protection.
3. Immerse Yourself in God's Word:
Immerse your mind and soul in God's Word constantly, being in The Word audibly reading it and memorizing it. Whether it's through daily devotions, Bible studies, or simply reflecting on verses that speak to your heart, the scriptures can bring peace and perspective in challenging times.
4. Scriptures on Post-It Notes:
Create a visual reminder of God's promises by placing scriptures on post-it notes in strategic places around your space. These little notes of encouragement can serve as constant reminders of God's love, grace, and faithfulness. It's a simple yet impactful way to keep His Word at the forefront of your mind throughout the day. I keep them in my purse, on my mirror, etc,
5. Wear Your Faith with Cute Clothes:
Wear it! Whether it's a tee with an uplifting message or accessories adorned with meaningful symbols, wearing your faith can be a powerful way to express your beliefs and serve as a reminder of the hope and love that surrounds you. Who doesn't love CUTE clothes that share our Love for Love Himself!?! I love these hoodies
The enemy would love for people to fall out of love, because heartbreak and loss weight our hearts. When our hearts are heavy, we don't respond in loving ways. In this season of love, let's first receive the Love of God into our hearts overflowing and recognize the schemes of the enemy who fight to divide us from Love. Then, let's extend our hearts to those who may be struggling and share these tips to help them find peace and joy. By reminding each other the importance of surrounding yourself with worship, connecting with a supportive community, immersing in God's Word, and putting on reminders of faith, you and your friends can navigate through challenges with hope and grace. Together, let's spread love and light in the lives of those who need it most.
Other resources that you will find helpful are Christian apps and ministries like Lifeway Women, Women of Faith and Proverb 31 Ministries to name a few.
Love & Hugs to Sweet Sister Friends!!!
I am so thankful YOU are in MY Heart Shaped Circle!!!!!
Love you,
Michele
Psst: I am hosting a 7 Day Challenge in my Group Feb 7-14th if you would like to join us there!!! www.ButGodSisterSquad.com
And if you're looking for MORE LOVE ideas, I have a big list for ya here!
If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!
Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
Love is in the air, and what better way to celebrate Valentine's Day than by showing your appreciation for the amazing Sister Friends who make life sweeter? Galentine's Day is the perfect occasion to express your gratitude for those special friendships that stand the test of time. This year, I've found put together a few of my ultimate Galentine's Day Gift ideas!! Hope you love them too!!
HOT Pink Tumbler! :Grab this COOL 40oz Tumbler on Amazon for your Besties for under $40! Whether she's sipping on her morning coffee, herbal tea, or just trying to hit her daily water intake, this tumbler is the perfect companion. It keeps her ICE cold and TEA hot...AND IT FITS INTO THE TINY CUP HOLDERS!!!! (All the Jeep Sisters need this one!!)
Friendship Bracelets: Show your love with a personalized touch by gifting friendship bracelets. Choose colors that resonate with your unique bond and add initials or a meaningful charm. It's a wearable reminder of your special connection, and every glance at the bracelet will bring a smile to your friend's face.
DIY Spa Day Kit: Treat your besties to a pampering spa day at home with a thoughtfully curated DIY spa kit. Include a cute stuffed animal or towelette, luxurious face masks, bath bombs, silk eye covers, essential oils and lotions and don't forget these slippers! I have gifted these slippers and they aren't the big goofy kind. If she has cold feet, she's gonna THANK YOU!
Sweet Handwritten Card: Our world craves personal touch. Create or buy a card and fill it with your favorite shared memories or affimations.
Virtual Movie Night Package: Distance can't keep you from celebrating together. Create a virtual movie night package for your friends with a subscription to a streaming service, some cozy blankets, and a selection of their favorite snacks. Plan a time to hit play simultaneously and enjoy a movie night together, even if you're miles apart.
Cute apparel: Who doesn't love CUTE clothes that share our Love for Love Himself!?! I love these hoodies from this faith based company!
This Galentine's Day, go beyond the ordinary and surprise your friends with gifts that reflect the uniqueness of your friendships. Whether it's a stylish tumbler, a DIY spa day kit, or a virtual movie night, these ideas are sure to make your Galentine's celebration unforgettable. Love & Hugs to Sweet Sister Friends!!!
I am so thankful YOU are in MY Heart Shaped Circle!!!!!
Love you,
Michele
Psst: I am hosting a 7 Day Challenge in my Group Feb 7-14th if you would like to join us there!!! www.ButGodSisterSquad.com
And if you're looking for MORE LOVE ideas, I have a big list for ya here!
If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!
Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
I enjoyed a great conversation today around Boundaries and of course, brought me straight into Sharing. We don't talk enough about the importance of establishing boundaries in our lives is. In a world that constantly demands our attention and energy, maintaining a healthy balance can be challenging but it's necessary for our health in body, mind and spirit. Boundaries are not just for when days are difficult....they help us in our every day well-being.
- Prioritize Spiritual Well-being: One of the fundamental reasons for setting boundaries is to prioritize our spiritual well-being. In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it's easy to lose sight of our relationship with God. Establishing boundaries allows us to create sacred space for prayer, meditation, and communion with God. By creating guidelines for our time with the Lord and making it a top priority, we then can guard our gates and are more likely to remain in the pasture God has us.
- Protect Emotional Health: Boundaries act as safeguards for our emotional health. As Christians, we are called to love and serve others, but it's essential to recognize when our emotional well-being is shifting outside of His provisions. Learning to say 'no' when necessary and establishing limits help prevent burnout and ensure that we maintain a healthy balance between selflessness and self-care. By prioritizing emotional health, we can better fulfill our calling to love others as ourselves.
- Align Boundaries with Biblical Principles: Christ-centered boundaries are firmly rooted in biblical principles. As we set boundaries, it's crucial to align them with the teachings of the Bible. Reflect on scriptures that guide us in maintaining healthy relationships, managing our time wisely, and honoring our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit. By setting our boundaries in God's Word, we ensure that they reflect His divine wisdom and contribute to our overall well-being.
Setting Christ-centered boundaries is not a sign of weakness but a testimony to our commitment of living a balanced life. As your Big Sis in the faith, I encourage you to prioritize your spiritual well-being, protect your emotional health, and align your boundaries with Biblical principles. In doing so, you'll discover peace, purpose, and freedom in your every day.
Sister, you are free indeed!!! God has boundaries, so can you!! If you are an Introvert who LOVES people and you enjoy this topic on boundaries....here's a video I just did!!
If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!
Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
I shared a video over on YouTube this morning sharing bout when you feel like you're in a "time out" or you feel stuck, pulled back and thought I'd add the link to it here too with some additional tips on listening to God...
In the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, finding moments of quiet reflection and seeking God's guidance can often be challenging. Yet, as Christians, cultivating a habit of actively listening to God is so important for spiritual growth and guidance. Here are some practical tips to help you create space for God's voice in your daily routine.
1. **Start Your Day with Prayer and Scripture:**
Begin your day by intentionally setting aside time for prayer and reading the The Word. This allows you to align your thoughts with God's Word and opens your heart to His leading. Consider meditating on a verse that resonates with you, helping with thoughts, feeling, plans for the day ahead. Be sure you are listening!
2. **Create Quiet Spaces:**
In the midst of a noisy world, carve out moments of silence by finding a quiet space where you can focus on God without distractions. Silence allows you to hear God's voice.
3. **Set Your Surroundings:**
Creating a calm atmosphere the best you can helps keep your heart and mind calm. For each person this will look different, so consider what you can do in your home or workplace that allows you to feel calm, focused, open...I love diffusing oils, comfy blankets, and listening to worship music in the background all day. This helps calm the mind, making it easier to hear God's gentle whispers throughout the day.
4. **Be Present in Daily Tasks:**
Incorporate mindfulness into everyday activities. Whether you're washing dishes, walking, or working, be fully present in the moment. This mindfulness allows you to invite God into the ordinary aspects of your day, recognizing His presence in the details.
5. **Journal Your Thoughts and Impressions:**
Keep a journal to document your prayers, thoughts, and any impressions you feel God is placing on your heart. Reviewing your entries can provide valuable insights into patterns, themes, and lessons God is teaching you. If you're not a journal girl, no biggie, take note, make a post, share with a friend. There are many ways to "note."
6. **Cultivate Gratitude:**
Expressing gratitude shifts your focus from what's lacking to the abundance God provides. Take moments throughout the day to thank Him for blessings, both big and small. A grateful heart is more able to give and receive.
By incorporating these practices into your daily routine, you'll be better positioned to listen to God's voice, seek His wisdom, and experience a deeper connection with Him throughout the day. Remember, it's not about finding large chunks of time, although there is nothing wrong with the especially for study times, but in the every day moments, as you go, let's be intentional in our moments to seek Him first when we question what is happening in certain moments.
Just remember His heart is always FOR YOU!!! If He is drawing you in, its purposeful.
Be sure to check out the video!
If today's encouragement hugged your HEART today, let me know in the comments or meet me over
in my Facebook Sisterhood Community! Feel free to share this blog with a friend who needs a heart hug too!
This is how YOU get to hug my HEART back!
Heart Hugs and Blessings,
Michele
